FOOTBALL commentator Clinton Grybas was one of the most decent and dignified men in a business not given to decency or dignity. Which makes what is unfolding around his death intensely distressing and ugly.
Unlike some in the media industry whose very existence seems dependent on publicity, Clinton would have hated this.
That is why what is happening needs to be addressed. And it is not simple.
This involves balancing the public's right to know and a grieving family's right to privacy.
Reaching that balance demands an assessment of what is in the public interest and what is simply of public interest.
It is ridiculous for Derryn Hinch or anybody else to argue that because they believe something to be correct it should be published.
Derryn's attitude to such things is not new and it is wrong.
He has broadcast a colleague's marriage break-up, deeply upset David Hookes' family with stories of his infidelity and been wildly inaccurate about what killed Graham Kennedy.
That has caused much pain, and for no good reason.
It is the responsibility of any journalist to balance hurt against benefit before going public.
Sometimes we get that wrong, but it is a judgment that must be expected if there is to be decency in media.
First, to what has happened.
Clinton Grybas died unexpectedly in January. He was young and fit.
Police quickly ruled out foul play, drugs, or suicide. The coroner was, and is, investigating.
There is no question Clinton died from natural causes and, as was explained on 3AW weeks ago, that was probably because of heart failure.
Two weeks ago the Herald Sun reported that Clinton's parents and his partner, Laurenna Toulmin, were in dispute over parts of his estate.
Then, on Tuesday, Derryn outlined suspicions around the nature of Clinton's heart failure, quoting "sources" saying that he had a faulty valve that was affected by an unknown allergy.
Both Clinton's distraught parents and the Coroner released statements saying the case was still open and the investigation was continuing.
Yesterday, his mother Sandra was far too emotional to speak further and Laurenna was in a similar state.
What did Derryn achieve?
The key people in this, all still grieving, have been hurt, and now see the memory of their loved one as somehow tarnished.
To what end? What has been broadcast is speculation.
But there's no sinister secret.
When a finding is reached the coroner will make it public once the family is informed.
That said, what does the public have a right to know?
It is true that because Clinton Grybas was a public figure his family cannot expect total privacy.
Many who had never met this man felt pain at his death and need to know what happened. That is a price his family must pay for Clinton's fame.
It is also true that if there was anything suspicious about his death it would be disgraceful to attempt to cover that up.
But there was nothing suspicious.
There were no drugs.
There was nothing untoward.
The only people to suggest otherwise have been the usual conspiracy theorists.
It's absurd to use such ill-informed rumour mongering as an excuse to make public details without family approval.
If there was incompetence or illegality involved in this death it would also be a case for total exposure.
There was not, so while the public may find vicarious satisfaction in the detail, it has no right to demand it.
The family's sensitivity is more important. Underneath all this is the feud around the estate.
Derryn referred to that on air as well and presumably he is sympathetic to Laurenna's view, as she is a friend.
Privately, that's fine, but publicly, this has nothing to do with any of us.
It is not a public scandal.
It is an extremely common type of disagreement played out by people tortured by grief. It is their business.
Beginning his comments this week, Derryn said: "I have to say something that may upset some people and may hurt some people but it has to be said."
Why? Decency and compassion have been forsaken, and nothing has been achieved.
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